husband drunk when i went into labor husband drunk when i went into labor

. The men or the women that married men like the ones referenced in the comments? . This is not going to change after the baby is born, he has made that clear. It is also a good idea to spend more time with your loved ones as this will reduce your stress levels and improve your mood. It's just that the cumulative effect of 4-5 drinks from 5pm until 10 or 11 makes me worry. Want to have a happier, healthier marriage? We checked into the hospital at 7am, they started pitocin by 8am, and he only stepped out of the room twice (to smoke :boo:) until 8pm when E was born. You really, really need to talk to him about this habit. Yo Ass don't git a medal fo' marryin yo' prom date. Good grief you have issues. When I was in labor with my first son, we had to drive through a snow storm to get to the hospital. My brother gets a Popeyes meal for my husband and tries to eat it in the hospital room with me. Sis takes me to the hospital and gets hold of husband. First of all, I'm sorry you're going through this; especially at this point in your pregnancy. In his sleep. After 26 hours of Oxytocin induced labour our son arrived and my hubby had the balls to say jokingly Well, at least we know hes hers! There was never any doubt about paternity, it was just his stupid sense of humour. My husband and I have had our problems with his drinking in the past. Heres the thing. The local McDonald's owner, Steve Akinboro, rewarded . He came back to the hospital with a thong. This was compounded by the fact I went from water breaking to transition skipping the first four stages of labor ( I couldnt even talk). A. I would be concerned about YH having 5 drinks in one night on a regular basis. Driving drunk is a big effing deal. Okay I did not go through labor we adopted our son but the night they called to say the birthmom was in labor I was at church while my husband was at home. I'll talk to him tomorrow. 45 minutes later, we left the house in a crazy snowstorm. My husband stopped drinking the first week in April. My husband was asleep in the chair and when they woke him up, he walked over to me and said, My foot hurts. REALLY? Then, after I finally pushed my baby out (an hour and a half of pushing), he complained about being exhausted. The elevator went up to the maternity clinic where i had to yell for help because i couldnt walk. 9. Exercise can be anything that gets the heart rate up, such as a long walk. I thought that was all obvious to DH but apparently I was wrong. This consultation should happen long before a manager is faced with a worker who might be drunk on the job, she said. My husband and I heeded the advice and packed a bunch of snacks. I don't know what kind of birth you're planning, but the Bradley books (Husband-Coached Childbirth and Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way, IIRC) are very insistent on how important it is that the husband be there to support, etc. I know the baby could come anytime now but I can't really worry too much about it or it will just make me worry more. When my nurse came in to reposition me I said, can you please wake my husband up his snoring is driving me nuts She did, and he said, well who can get any sleep around here with that beeping(referring to the sound of our sons internal fetal heart rate monitor) It was driving me nuts so I put the pillow over my head!. My water broke in the middle of the night, we made our way to the hospital and once we arrived i was put in a wheel chair, wheeled into the elevator and left unable to walk because of pain while my husband went to find a free parking spot. With our fourth, he was perfect and even had to help deliver the baby!! Around 10 am he announces that he has to go home because the Popeyes he ate has given him food poisoning. Go figure! Misty, My husband left me, when I was in labor, to go buy a PS3 (it was Black Friday). Finally after I frantically run around the church for a few mins he calls back in which I tell him get all our pre packed bags and carseat ready to go Im on my way home she is in labor, we lived 4 hours from the birthmom. However, you can convince them to set certain limits to how much they should be drinking. I could even understand maybe a beer or glass of wine a night (which I still think every night is pushing it) BUT 5+ a nightdo you think that is normal behavior? Since our house is on the way to the hospital, we stopped to get our bags. Whos really stupid? That's some heavy drinking. She was even . If you are married to an alcoholic, here are seven ways to deal with the problem. In labor with our second after my water broke at 6am. I had some see threw jammies to wear home >.<. Both those incidents still come up at family get togethers. I also worry about his habit when the baby comes, if he needs to unwind now it's going to get a lot worse when the baby is around as far as stress level goes. You can't drive yourself, and if he's been drinking that much then you are taking cab. Okayjust to show another sidebecause I love this storywith my third we had some complications and had an emergency c section. The. When you sent the call out, you said husbands, and I totally forgot what my dad did the night I was born. He finally comes back as I was about to go investigate (and by investigate, I mean cause bodily harm) and explained that he had food stuck in his teeth so he had been trying to floss it out!!!!!! We have the ability to maintain our rage and hide it away for just the right amount of time so it can be released with maximum effect at precisely the right time. I was on the floor screaming with what I thought were bad early labor contractions, but later found out I was already in full labor. DH is not allowed to drink at all right now..my life and his unborn child are going to be in his hands when he drives me to the hospital. Some women experience other symptoms of labor with a bloody show: Cramping: You may feel period-like cramps that come and go over the course of hours or even days. One 2013 study, found that even . Mum had gone in to hospital and he was working. It was his decision. Some places test moms for COVID-19 at 36 to 38 weeks or before they undergo a C-section, while others don't test at all or do it when a case of the virus is suspected. When they dont have a limit, they will drink more than they need to and will surely be uncontrollable. Also I am not a screamer, and when the contractions were fierce like that, I would just lay on my side, tightly gripping the bed rail, sometimes whimpering quietly as I waited for it to pass. My husband was working at the lake (20 min away) and was rushing home to change and come to the hospital. My husband was behind me holding me up while I squatted when a nurse looked at him funny and said You dont look so hot. I shoot him a look and he says oh, I thought you would drive. I was 7cm dilated when they checked me in. Probably because I threatened him with bodily harm if he didnt. Nesting. I was progressing very rapidly and I was in great pain. E had a little trouble at first and I needed stitches, so DH stayed with us until 2am before he ran home to let our dogs out to go to the bathroom and he never did tell me if he needed to clean anything up while he was there! husband drunk when i went into labor Home; FAQ; Foto; Contact I would talk to him on a day he doesn't work like people said, and maybe keep a taxi service on speed dial. My FI usually has a few drinks every night too but I am not really worried about him not being able to drive to the hospital because theres tons of people around us who would be more than willing to drive me there. My husband made the list! Allison Leonard/Ilona McCarty. It's not much to ask for him to give up drinking for a couple of weeks or to just tone it down to a couple just in case so that he can still drive ina pinch. Not only is he really annoying when buzzed, which will piss me off and make my pain and anxiety higher, but he can't drive! I gave birth to our baby in our house on our bed till i was discovered by his fifteen year old niece. And yeahshe figured it out and got him out quickly after that, but he was deeply bruised and as a result had terrible jaundice, needing bili blankets through the fifth day and had muscular trauma in his neck that he needed therapy to correct for two years afterward. Hopefully not, so perhaps you can work that angle to get him to realize that he has to drive you to the hospital. At 9 am, contractions really kicked in and still no hubby. Doctor goes into labor while delivering patient's baby My husband has never gotten a drivers license so I had to drive us the 25 minutes to the hospital while dealing with early contractions. I gave birth in a Cambodian hospital that, well lets say was set up with top notch 1950s style equipment. Upon completion of said EP, he gave it to the neighbor. After 38 hrs of labor, My hubby looked at me, with this serious look on his face, while Im pushing our daughters head out, and saidwell that was easy, can we do it again? (It meaning have another baby)i told him sure, but you can carry it this time!, After I had a surgery on my left breast, my husband asked what he would were to an event! So, the advice here is to keep away from the situation and let things happen. I went into Labor at 1AM after Superbowl Sunday - DH drank a good part of the day and night and had gone to bed around 11 that. Braxton hicks will go away with rest, hydration and change of activity in most cases. I waddle downstairs expecting everyone to be ready to leave and find them eating waffles and watching cartoons. When a child is born, act up, misbehaves, it is still our child. So, do you maintain the rage? He thinks he's being 110% supportive, and says he will, but just drinking when I could go into labor any day is NOT supporting IMO. Needless to say, he was NOT happy about that statement but I don't care. My Husband is a Drunk. And I don't know how, why or when it | by You're going into labour and your husband's drunk in bed - Mamamia He said he needed to shower and run a couple of errands and get some lunch. around 9 he came to bed, moved me over and tried to go to sleep. husband drunk when i went into labor. Guess who is going to be taking care of the baby all night through? Its like, my mother went through this, and her mother before her, and, well, basically every woman who ever gave birth went through this & got over it, unless it killed em, so Im going to sit here and appear mildly concerned on the surface but secretly bemused that Im not in your position right now, and knowing, with modern medicine the way it is, that youre going to be all right soon enough, and even lord it over me eventually in the same secret way I enjoyed your suffering. Hopefully our midwife keeps him in line. He hasn't had one drink since that night because he knows I'm serious. I made breakfast. By the way, he would never drive while drinking, he thought it would be completely fine to call an ambulance to take me to the hospital if he's drunk. I had our birth center bag ready. Just have a rational, heart to heart talk to him when he is not stressed out. Now I refuse to touch it so that I can pass it down to my own daughter. The following is an exclusive excerpt of Goodbye, Sweet Girl: A Story of Domestic Violence and Survival, a new memoir by Kelly Sundberg (available June 5). They might have difficulties controlling their emotions and be prone to anger or violent behavior when drunk. Guys like you make it possible for guys like me to find great women and kids. It's too much. He was about 4 minutes from the hospital but after 20 minutes he stillhadnt shown up. Of course, I ended up delivering at 230 AM and when I asked for something to eat, the doctor told me Id have to wait until the cafeteria opened. He is lucky I didnt kill him. I was laying on the bed playing And E was sitting in my desk chair. He hesitated and then said, I ate it all. I was so busy being in labor that I failed to notice he was munching on my all my snacks! About 15 minutes or so later I hear my wife come in the house and call out to let me know she was home. -Carrie, After I finally agreed to an epidural, the nurse explained that it would feel like a quick little bee sting. If he won't deal with that, you should. Yeah right. Around 3am I felt a twinge. Im 38 weeks pregnant so after a couple hours (10:30pm) I went inside with my 2 yr old, only to come back down to him still drinking and now smoking hookah with his brother, male cousins and 3 young thots that showed up. This makes me smile and has healed that little part of me that resented having to be alone and strong at that one beautiful moment. After the haircut I assume we will be leaving for the hospital and then he informs me he needs to take a shower to get the hair off. When I was younger and unmarried, I had a boyfriend who was often kind of rude to me in social situations. Haha! Want Mommy Shorts delivered daily or weekly to your inbox? So here I am in the passenger seat, in labor, trying (graciously, mind you) to keep my moaning down so he can make this call. People with drinking problems do no slow their drinking down just "because" nor do they consider how their drinking will affect the other people in their lives. Even if this method doesn't work, it's a great way to relieve stress and keep your body strong for the . We got to the hospital at 5 pm. Dont come to me saying look what your child did. It is always our child. Probably my biggest moment of suppressed anger started on the 2nd of December, 2006. A man can metabolize 2 drinks a day. I am so thankful and blessed I dont have a story to share like this. Hes pretty lucky the epidural finally kicked in halfway through their lunch date! Sure having a bonfire or watching a big game with the buddies and having that many once and a while is no big deal, but being unable, or unwilling, to stop drinking heavily on a regular basis should be a huge red flag. To this day I cant even enjoy an episode of Duck Dynasty without wanting to smother him. Sandals and flip flops are not recommended, especially if a situation arises where you may have to go into an operating room. Are you kidding me? One suggestion was to bring food just in case I delivered in the middle of the night and the cafeteria was closed (everyone said Id be STARVING after delivery). My hubby is a talker, too. When I called him an hour later because I was 9 centimeters he said he was at Sams buying Tupperware. We went to a friends wedding about 3 weeks ago and I asked him before hand not to drink and he did anyways and got pretty drunk. If we go anywhere and he has more than 2 drinks I drive home. You probably will NEVER be in that much pain but if you are, I sincerely hope you remember what you said! I folded those clothes some more. Whats worse is that his parents brought him back to the hospital drunk as a skunk. Alcoholism is a condition that occurs when someone becomes dependent on alcohol to the point where it controls their life. If it were me, I would tell him in no uncertain terms that if he wants to be there that he has to be 100% sober. "Had 'bloody show' for two weeks prior to my water breaking and even lost my mucus plug and NADA! 2-Year-Old Boy Is Found Drunk After Mother Goes Into Labor Experiencing a craving for alcohol. He happily, obliviously goes back to work. This is YOUR own husband being an alcoholic. I think your husband should be able to handle 3-5 weeks of not drinking in exchange for a healthy baby and wife. I was induced w/our first, and it took a while for things to kick in. Seriously?? The next few hours are a blur but my husband keeps having to leave to use the bathroom. Once we got to the hospital, though, he was great. These are hilarious! They were 1 minute apart, which was not what the books and classes told us we should be at this early on. She re-positioned the monitor and the needle was off both sides of the page. This, I really think that you need to convey how important it is to you and the baby, then make sure that he realizes how serious you are that you NEED a coach to help get you through this and if he is to drunk to do it then you will find someone else and he will be relegated to the waiting room. no one to watch my kids when I go into labor | BabyCenter 1. I guess this is natures version of temporary amnesia because clearly, without it, wed never go back for more. this was his fourth child. Besides, alcoholic people need reasons to blame people for their condition. My mom would have been my birth coach. Mine said I was making a spectacle of myself while in an induced labor with back to back contractions. A 'habit' of drinking more than 5 drinks in a night, thinking that he 'deserves' to unwind however he wants, these are signs that he dependent on alcohol. My husband has already been given the expectation that the next couple weeks he can't drink all that much (not like he does normally, but he is trying to plan a guy's night this . How do you know he will take you seriously if you tell him you are uncomfortable with the amount he is drinking? I find it pretty fvcked up that you are okay with him drinking a "few drinks every night" since someone else can drive you to give birth to yours and HIS own child. What bugged me was that my husband didnt want to call into work so I was the one who had to meet the girl and her entire family (her, her boyfriend(not the dad), her mom, dad, grandma, step mom, step dad, sister and I think the family dog. I was having post labor contractions holding onto the counter begging him to just microwave a Mac and cheese from the freezer talking him through it. Oh, yeah, I am sure he will slow it down. I am not saying what your DH is doing is right, in fact, I think 5 drinks every night is a bit heavy and you should talk to him about it. Get this man an epidural. My Birth Story: I Can't Feel My Contractions | Women's Health Someone needs to tell them it is not helpful to say things likeHere we go. and This looks like a big one.. One of the most commonly talked about signs of impending labor, many women begin cleaning and re-arranging baby items in the days or hours before labor begins. I'm so sorry that you are going through this, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Why do I remember the date so well? Sexuality has nothing to do with a persons character or supportiveness. Know your own limitations. It wasnt until I went into labor in the middle of the night that I realized he dropped the ball. Delivery type: Vaginal that progressed to C-section. Jackass. I was always sad that I was alone when my sweet son was born. Copyright 2009-2023 Creative Skirt, LLC. The following morning,he woke up very early and went to work! Because, he was a little bit tired. When my contractions were less than 2mins apart, I told my husband we needed to leave. No matter how many times this joke-cum-legend is passed off as a recent tale, nothing will . "When I [give] with just with my doula and midwife alone, I can allow myself to do whatever is needed to get the baby out," she says. Alcoholism is a serious addiction that can affect both the addict and those around them. However, this may all change come December when I'm giving birth to our first child. I almost left the house to officiate a HS basketball game (scrimmage) when she was in labor. Rachell, I was in labor all night and ready to go in the morning. When I mentioned this is really beginning to hurt, his comment? Soon enough he gets a call from his mother asking how the delivery is going. Amy Dickinson. Nipple Stimulation. If you are having symptoms of preterm labor, call your healthcare provider right away. Needless to say when i got there i was 8 cm dialated and fully efaced and it was to late to even get an epidural . Your DH's drinking is outside what is healthy, for him, for your relationship, and for your new family. Thanks for the laughs though! It's like a moron twilight zone in here. . I used to go with him but stopped after getting pregnant as i didnt announce till 12 weeks and making excuses about not . Well, watched is a bit strong, but it was on the entire time! )My husband was engrossed by the Daytona 500. 6/20 She Was Playing Bingo When She Went Into Labor. I called him to come home and he suggested id feel better walking up and down the street. So I called him to tell him to hurry and get there. Oh well, possibly because it was the day before I gave birth to our 3rd child, Jack. When you go through what women go through in labor and delivery, you can tell us about being bitchy. It helps release oxytocin, which is the hormone that causes your uterus to contract. Because she was in labor, he should have endured what, no food, no water, no bathroom, what is good enough? I was only at the hospital for two hours before she arrived. Not saying you aren't important to him..I'm sure you mean the world to him but having a child is a whole new/different kind of love that might just make him realize the drinking like he does needs to slow down. Mortifying. Needless to say, when, four weeks later he was resting a pack of frozen peas on his testicles from the vasectomy hed breezily put his hand up for, my sympathy levels were small to non-existent. an hour later, he arrived 15 minutes before our daughter did. Its a disorder or an addiction that needs treatment than just taking the blame. I spent the entire time in the hospital alone. Then he is hungry and is trying to make a sandwich and I inform him it is time to leave for the hospital. I dont remember anything I said or did after that. When one starts living with a functioning alcoholic husband, they try to take control of situations, as mentioned above, and behave as a counselor. Creative Skirt reserves the right to use all submitted photos, It is also important to seek professional. I wish you luckI would talk to him now about this habit! We finally make it to the hospital and Im left alone for quite a while and I find out why when he strolls into the room with his lunch of a turkey sandwich, clam chowder soup and soda and he says, dont worry honey, I didnt forget about you, here are your ice chips. He then proceeds to interview and film every nurse that enters the room and when it is time to film the labor, we were out of film, wonder why. He went to smoke a cigarette before the midwife came to see me,and by the time he got back, I was already pushing. We went to the urologist and he laughed out loud when my DH said that he was a moderate drinker and then told him that he usually had 1 or 2 beers a day. In the car, everything was very annoying to me: the radio, the sound of my husband at the time talking on the phone, just everything. Im late to the party but here is a story for you I've tried explaining this to him, but he . After our first they were sewing me up from some tearing. Michelle, My husband took a conference call on the way to the hospital. Only when you will make them realize that it is a problem and it puts you in an awkward position afterward, they might understand the intensity of the issue and will look for a solution. Andhe bowled the only perfect game of his entire life! My dad went out for tacos! When I kicked it off and yelled at him to get whatever was touching me off, he responded with its just a magazine. Here is a picture of him, having a little lie down with Jack about 20 minutes after he was born. He was much better with our sons birth though even cleaned up after me when I puked in the basin I still hold that first time against him though! 1. since the 4th month. So, instead of trying to take control of everything, just wait for them to accept that they have a problem and need help. Which is normally fine, but NOT when your in labor! He didn't drink for the majority of my pregnancy, but then went out to a work function and came home wasted (he was driven home by a coworker). She all but collapses into my arms exhausted to the point she couldn't even walk to the bedroom. Posted 6/9/10. Labour won't "sober him up" and make it safe for him to drive. After our daughter was born he For instance, Mike made me wait in the lobby of our building while he went to get a . If it's 5 hard drinks every night I would say that's a bit excessive to unwind. Thanks! He arrived at the hospital with an emerald ring to give her..because after all, it was Mothers Day, and I was born in May. I know you don't want to hear this, but you really need to read up on alcoholism. So there are nights of going to bed and retreating to our own sides of the bed. Imagine youre married to an alcoholic husband who drinks daily and beyond the limit, only to create a nuisance later. If the birth of his child is not enough to deter him from drinking for a few weeks, then he has a serious problem. Its never easy to be with an alcoholic husband, but these things can surely help. The worst you could do is take the place of a professional and try to look for solutions to cure it. The best way to cope with your stress and maintain a positive attitude is to stay focused on your goals and avoid situations that may trigger the urge to drink. But he's probably young enough where that can all be avoided if he changes his patterns NOW. 26 years of marriage has taught me to make sure she is comfortable and has what she needs first and to be honest about what I need. He normally goes to the pub every Friday, not too late. That he won't stop for a few weeks while you approach the end of your pregnancy (or forever) is even MORE indicative of that dependency and addiction. What does his choice of alchohol have to do with it? So not only did my husband eat an Indian take-away while I was in the throws of labour, he told me my hair looked a mess. 10 Early Signs of Labor That Tell You the Baby Is Coming - Fatherly The longer you hide your head in the sand the bigger the issue will get. We couldnt wake him up, he was barely opening his eyes when the baby crowned. -Stephanie, My husband started throwing up while I was pushing. Its not a movie wherein things change quickly. Alcoholism is quite difficult to catch during the initial few meetings, but by the time you get to know about it, it is too late. that actually is true, no one under a certain age . We asked around and found 10 different ways women knew they were in labor. Would you trust him to drive? 16/12/2017 05:17. He did later apologize. Many, many people struggle with this same issue, and there is help available if he chooses to use it. I was so out of it by this point (having no pain medication at all) that I did not know my husband had helped. It was like something from a movie. Ouch. posts, and comments anonymously, in any medium. 28 Examples of Crap Husbands Pull While Their Wives are in Labor. I was in labor half the night and at around 7 am I say to my hubby its time to go to the hospital. He then moved to the toilet to puke some more before I yelled at him that hed better get the hell out of there because I needed it NOW. The nurse had him switch out for my best friend and he scooted over to sit next to me on the bed and just as a nurse pushed a trash can in front of him he proceeded to PUKE LOUDLY next to me on the bed while I was in transition! Grab Now! My hubby has a habit of drinking a lot (over 5 drinks in an evening) after a rough day at work, and I'm worried I'll go into labor, and he'll be extremely buzzed. Nothing until we got home. Most of the responses ignore the real issues, blame it on men being stupid, or just excuse his behavior. Every year, nearly 9,000 women in the U.S. go into labor and, unable to make it to the hospital, have an unplanned or unattended birth at home or in the car on the way to the hospital. "Put. I don't know if this has impacted on the way I hold my emotions, but I tend to really bottle everything up until it all becomes too much - even then though it's VERY difficult to communicate any angst or anything that's bothering me. Its a natural tendency to try and take control of the alcoholic husband in order to make things right. When we had our first child, I was nesting like mad crazy the night before (I was in labor, and my house had to be clean for my mom). I finally woke him up to help me time them, since they were getting more intense. Im not sure where to start with my story and it has been 20 years and fresh in my mind. I push for over two hours and my daughter was born at 6:55 am. AITA for telling my husband I won't be calling him when I go into I write about that struggle & stuff.